Global Drifting

 

Due to heedless human activity, plate tectonics is increasing at an alarming rate. Soon, if this situation is not amended, Global Drifting will send the continents crashing together, and the planet will split asunder!

 

In these end times, watch for an increase in seismic and volcanic activity. An upward trend is evidence of a massive increase in Global Drifting. A downward trend indicates that Global Drifting is increasing massively, and is building up in silence to a cataclysmic retribution.

 

The deep-pocket industrialized nations have been enjoying too much prosperity for too long. Their unbridled activity causes destructive vibrations in the Earth's crust, and the weight of their cities destabilizes the continents, speeding the planet to its doom. The Third World pays for this iniquity: subduction is reducing the land-mass of some of those countries, while crustal upheaval is jamming mountain ranges into others. The Himalayas are gaining height at a record rate; snow leopards there must run down hill just to maintain an altitude at which they can survive.

 

What can you do? Earn Tectonic-Credits by paying people in Third Word countries to jump up and down, thus counteracting vibration in the industrialized nations. Cease any unnecessary activity: sit quietly with your hands folded and pray quietly for the extinction of humanity. Most importantly, beseech the UN to govern the world economy, order all activity, and redistribute wealth "fairly".

 

Stop Global Drifting!

 

 

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